Long gone are the days of strutting in to defibrillate a patient during a cardiac arrest with a set of paddles dripping with conductive gel, waving about importantly before you.
These days we use specialized adhesive defibrillation pads that you just stick onto the patients chest. They are much safer, more effective, and decrease the chances the staff getting accidental shocks. Yup, the pads are here to stay.
Call me old fashioned if you will, but it’s not the same. We still shout “stand clear!“…..but then we all just stand around whilst someone pushes this small orange button. It’s a little anti-climactic.
In an effort to try and stop the staff feeling so glum during arrests, I decided to make a few modifications to our Zoll Defibrillator.
Now we still use pads, but the pitiful orange button has been replaced by a giant Mad Scientist type knife switch. When you yell “stand clear!” with this baby, you are going to get some respect.
“I am about… to throw… the switch!”
It also has a wireless link to the rooms lighting panel and momentarily dims and flickers the lights for effect.
Now this is a defibrillator.
That is AWESOME!!! I SOOOO want one!
Dear Santa….
i dont know about you guys but in my hospital we still have the new phillips heartstart which has the manual paddles it takes to long to attach the pads to a patients chest its quicker to grab the paddles off the cart and have someone charge it then defibrilate.. Codes are why i went to med school
I want one. I’m all for putting the fun back into a code.
It also needs a crank at the back so that you have to create a little of the charge yourself by winding it before you can throw the switch. And smoke needs to come out of the handle when you flick the switch.
I see Crocodile Dundee selling this.
That’s not a defibrillator. This is a defibrillator.
Who do I talk to about permission to reprint this in Emergency Physicians Monthly? This is very funny.
Mark
Definitely something we should be looking at.
Joe Hage
Director of Marketing Communications
Cardiac Science, makers of Powerheart AEDs
Follow us on Twitter at @CardiacScience
It definitely needs a Jacob’s Ladder on top for the full mad-scientist look.
Gorgeous, but one more little tweak:
See those red binding posts on the front of the switch? They need to be connected to the control box via wires wound into loose coils. Plus, the “charged” indicator needs to be a clear light bulb with a single loop filament and the glass-blowers nipple on top.
Love it! So do we get one of these in resus soon???
Luvs it! Can we then yell “It’s alive, it’s alive,” in a maniacal voice when it works?
You forgot to mention licking the paddles for better conductivity prior to administering the jolt. Oh yeah, and leaving a couple of half-empty bottles of Jolt cola around, just for effect, of course.
Additional feature is you spring for the deluxe model:
When sinus rhythm is re-established you get an audio clip “It’s ALIIIIIVE!!!!!” followed by the mandatory evil/insane laugh…
Can I order one for my ward please? If I can’t work in ED, I at least want one of these babies! It will make my BLS education sessions much better!
I love it!
I want it.
IT… COULD… WORK!!
Will you be marketing a mobile version for use prehospital?
OMG, that is hysterical! I work in an EP lab and that would be CLASSIC! (I love the addition of the lights dimming)