dental floss as life support equipment.
By impactEDnurse • May 7th, 2007 • Category: the funnybone.There are two types of ED nurse. Those that carry a roll of dental floss around in the pocket of their scrubs. And those who do not.
Dental floss is the latest *must have* accessory for the well equipped ED nurse. Lets take a closer look at this piece of simple but effective life support equipment:
- Remove an impaled fish hook. I once looked after this guy who used to have a large 4-hook fishing lure hanging from his rear view mirror as an ornament. Needless to say, he presented with it impaled deeply in his forehead.
To remove hooks in such cases, first measure out around 3 meters of dental floss. Next, carefully tie one end of the floss around the eye of the fishhook. Place the patient in a comfortable supine position. Tie the other end around the handle of the crash cart.
Return to the nurses desk and call a code. - Fix a broken cardiac monitor. Did you just break that expensive ECG monitor? (I told you not to fiddle with it). Don’t worry, your floss will get you out of this one.
First. Has anybody seen? Good.
Lick along a length of dental floss and stick it up across the monitor in the shape of an ECG tracing. It’s a bit tricky to get Sinus Rhythm… so if you’re in a hurry Asystole will do.
Presto. Instant cardiac monitoring. Now leave the scene of the crime. - Remove a stuck ring. Nothing is as frustrating as trying to get that stuck ring off the patients rapidly swelling finger. Its worth an absolute bomb and the patient would prefer to loose their finger rather than have you cut it off.
With a length of dental floss and some lubricant you have a chance to make a new (and wealthy) friend. Here’s how. - Fix your stethoscope. Lost one of the earpieces on your stethoscope? Spool floss tightly around the metal tip of the affected end. Stick down with a gob of earwax (you will find plenty in the remaining earpiece no doubt) and mould into shape.
- Improve productivity (males only). Remove wasted time taking those desperate toilet breaks by wrapping floss tightly around and around your willy.
Take care when loosening at the end of the shift. You know what its like when you loose control of the garden hose. - Foetal DNA determinator. Tie a small object such as a pen lid to length of floss to form a pendulum. (For optimal results a large kidney stone works best.) Hold over mothers abdomen and observe for swing.
Circular motion = female.
Linear motion = male.
Figure-eight motion= future paramedic. - Cut cake. Find yourself in the tea room with a perfectly delicious chocolate mud cake, and no knife to cut it with? Whip out your floss and hold a long length taught between your hands. Use like a cheese wire to quickly slice the cake into segments. You now get first (and biggest) serve…. Its the law.
impactEDnurse is also known as Ian Miller, a nurse with over 26 years experience working in a busy emergency department in, Australia. This site in no way reflects the opinions of that hospital.
All stories (although based on actual experiences) have been changed to protect patient confidentiality.
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You are quite imaginative, and are no doubt a terrific resource in your ED.
And you are also probably suspect #1 when they find dental floss on a broken monitor…
That’ll get that fishhook out in a hurry
Dental floss and duct tape. There can’t be anything to add to that.
Awesome writing as always. Now, I’ll need to ask my mum if I really was a figure 8 motion….
Hi, great site. I’m a veterinarian that stumbled in via a link from the Veterinary Information Network (VIN), now I’m wandering around enjoying myself.
There is a technique for the extraction of a fishhook that’s similar to what you describe. When the floss gets jerked, it needs to be looped around the bend of the hook (opposite direction from the way it went in). After all, you’re trying to back the hook out, not set it more deeply, which is what will happen if the floss is tied to the eye of the hook.
Normally, the barb in the hook is what keeps it from backing out. With the exception of some really huge big game hooks, nearly all barbs are cut into the inside surface of the point. To release the barb, press downward on the shank of the hook at a 90 degree angle to the point of the hook, ie. press the shank of the hook towards the skin (typically the shank will be parallel to the skin).
Then, “call a code” (jerk HARD on the bend of the hook).
The downward pressure on the shank will allow the barb enough space to let the hook pop free. Make sure no one is standing behind it (the hook will fly across the room).
The wife of my practice partner is an RN, working in a trauma unit. I sent her a link to the site.