New Release: The Stetho-stun.

the funnybone., the nurses desk: Add comments
Aug 082009

Following the recent discussion surrounding the usage of Tasers into our emergency departments, the evil mad scientists down in the impactednurse secret laboratory (located behind a hidden sliding door in the pan room) are now ready to release the STETHO-STUN.

It allows the best dressed emergency doctor or nurse to maintain their professional image whilst packing a little ‘doctors orders’ for those Saturday night obnoxicated1 presentations that want to get in your face.
With the flip of a switch, this fully functioning stethoscope will deliver an incapacitating shock at up to 10 meters.
Next!

Also has a Keep-Me-Up Mode that delivers a slightly lesser shock through the ear pieces at random intervals that is guaranteed to get you through to the morning without nodding off and dribbling all over your patients notes.

  1. OBNOXICATED: obnoxious and intoxicated and agressive. [↩]
Posted by impactEDnurse on August 8, 2009

7 Responses to “New Release: The Stetho-stun.”

  1. Defibritazer BP50KV | Life in the Fast Lane says:
    September 28, 2010 at 1:58 am

    [...] to restrict your options to best manage this patient with physical restraint, chemical restraint, the stetho-stun or cardioversion? Now you can have your cake and eat [...]

  2. Soph says:
    September 27, 2010 at 6:13 pm

    Where can I place my order?

    Reply
  3. Lyall says:
    September 27, 2010 at 12:53 am

    THANKS. FOR. NOTHING. IAN.

    It appears @EgertonYDavisIV on Twitter has noticed the Stetho-stun http://arseh.at/d9

    I now suspect the Stetho-stun will be added to already planned demonstration of the Defibritazer http://lifeinthefastlane.com/2010/09/defibritazer/#comment-80053936 at the upcoming UCEM conference. For this you have earned my eternal disdain (not that you’ll care when you’re made a F.UCEM).

    Reply
  4. Jen says:
    September 26, 2010 at 10:46 am

    Please send mine..ASAP.. the drunks from the park are due in any min.

    Reply
  5. Traci says:
    August 9, 2009 at 7:16 am

    I’ll take a case of these for myself and my coworkers!

    Reply
  6. Rachel says:
    August 8, 2009 at 10:46 pm

    ROFL!! Classic!!!

    Reply
  7. helva says:
    August 8, 2009 at 7:18 pm

    LMAOROTF

    Reply

Leave a Reply

(required)

(required)

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

  • mean arterial pressure. (29)
    • James Senior said: Thank you, for a beautiful description of MAP…always love to use your material as a reference. James

    • ofelia said: Never heard about MAP before today, I had been taking medication for high blood pressure for10 years, until I found a Dr. that told me that I could get rid of the pills with alternative medicine, been off the pills for three months now, and there are days that I worry about my readings, even though most of them are within normal...

  • New graduate nurses, do we need them….or not? (10)
    • John said: It’s not a failure of leadership but a plan to destabilize our medical system and fully privatize it. No more medicare, user pays, just like in the U.S. Also an excuse to import foreigners, give them citizinship, then use there citizinship to increase Australia’s international debt borrowing. No, you won’t read that...

  • nurses fuck cancer. (3)
    • Rachel said: I agree with you Fabbia. No matter how much we try to be good at educating our patients, at the end it is still up to the patient’s decision whether to follow what we have said or not. On our side, at least we know we have given whats the best for them. We can’t touch every patient’s lives always.

  • yes. I am going to write a book. (11)
    • Brad Winter said: Nice work Ian! I hope you find your book writing mojo and get it published – it’s a new challenge and I think we all know you’re up for it. Good luck!

  • Nurses…show us your pouches! (10)
    • Sarah said: I have a lot of pockets. A LOT. However I may be tempted over to the pouch side

  • killing the cardiac arrest mind donk. (3)
    • Leigh said: Re: assembling the team. On the phone to reception “code (…ummm) RED in resus!!”…reception “do you mean code blue?” “YES!! that one”. Should have assembled self first. Thanks reception.

  • hardcore nursing revolution. (15)
    • Leigh said: inspiring piece Ian! thanks. And Stephen, great summary too! “The amazing thing about us is, no information is too important for our concern; no job is too low to tackle ourselves. We are the proverbial jack of all practitioners.” love it